For the month of November, I read The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy Keller.
“To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear. But to be fully known and truly loved is, well, a lot like being loved by God. It is what we need more than anything. It liberates us from pretense, humbles us out of our self-righteousness, and fortifies us for any difficulty life can throw at us” (Keller, p. 101).
I’ve been wanting to read this book for a long time. A lot of friends told me this book really shaped their perspective of marriage, so I had high hopes… and Keller didn’t disappoint.
Part of the reason I had put off reading this book for so long was that I thought it would be a heavy read. Keller is a smart man, and some of his books are not light reads, to say the least, ha! But, as soon as I opened it up, I realized I had totally misjudged it. Part of the reason I love this book so much is that it was so easy to read! Easy in the sense of his use of language, that is. But not exactly easy to read in the message he laid out, if you know what I mean.
I absolutely love being married to Jacob. We have so much fun together, we dream big together, we do the silly little things together, and he gets me. He is “my person” for all of you Grey’s fans out there. We joke when we hear people who get engaged saying, “I get to marry my best friend!” (because EVERYONE says that!) because we weren’t really best friends when we got married. We were good friends, but we still had other people in our lives we’d run to first. Now, though, there’s no doubt in either of our minds that we’re each other’s best friend. And I love it.
Growing to know and love Jacob through marriage has been wonderful, and also wonderfully hard, which is where I’m wrapping back to Keller’s book. He talks a lot about reciprocal selflessness. One of the foundational parts of a strong, God-centered marriage is practicing selflessness toward one another.
Marriage will not fulfill your every need for self worth and appreciation. Marriage will show you how much you fall short of who you think you are. But that process of seeing your own sin and choosing Christ instead of it – choosing to selflessly love your spouse even though it’s hard – that’s where you strike gold. That’s when your marriage starts shaping into what you dreamt it would be.
His book reminded me of a lot of things I’d heard before, but it was the reminder I needed now. I could read marriage books all day, but if what I read doesn’t translate into my actions, what’s the point? It’s so easy for me to get caught up in my to-do list, evening commitments and how tired I feel that I simply forget to put Jacob first. That’s not the way I want to live. I’d encourage anyone currently married, engaged, or pursuing marriage in their life to read this book. It holds great lessons even outside of marriage.
I can’t wait to read your reviews – you can find out what Operation Read Your Shelves is all about below, and link up your posts at the bottom of mine! 🙂
So, what’s Operation Read Your Shelves all about?
ORYS is a book review link up geared toward people who love to buy books, but aren’t great at reading them. In other words, you have shelves full of books you haven’t read yet. And you probably have a few sitting in your “Amazon WishList,” too. 😉
This link up is a great way to hold yourself accountable to reading a book or two that you already own OR actually reading the new books you buy each month, and it will absolutely feed your growing list of to-read books. So you can get some reading done, connect with other book lovers and add more great books to your list!
The link up goes live the First Monday of each month, so mark your calendars! Have questions? Check out this post, or comment below and I’ll answer ASAP.
Now, let’s link up!
2. The link up will be live today through Friday at midnight, so you can link up your posts until then.
3. Please either link back to this post in your post, or display the button below. Also, use the #OperationReadYourShelves to share via social media!
Link up your posts below:
*When completing link up form, please title your link BLOG NAME: BOOK TITLE as “title.”