All the things they say about The Last Month of Pregnancy are true. For some reason, there was definitely a part of me that thought those things won’t happen to me…
But I was wrong. Oh, so wrong.
Let’s start with the cankles. WHAT IS HAPPENING. It’s like one day I looked down and realized I have balloons for feet. I honestly have no idea when this happened, but it’s awful. I had to go out and buy some new shoes last week just so I’d have something to wear! I long for the days postpartum when I can look down and appreciate the ankles God has given me again.
Then there’s the swelling in my hands. That wouldn’t bother me as much if it didn’t bring numbness with it and aches that extend into my forearms. There are legitimate times throughout the day that my arms ache so badly I just cry in frustration. I JUST WANT TO WASH THE DISHES IN PEACE. Never thought I’d say that.
Speaking of washing the dishes, that’s becoming quite the task on its own due to my ever expanding belly. I noticed my back starts hurting after a couple minutes because I’m leaning at a weird angle in order to reach over my belly. Ha!!! The little things, y’all.
But on a much more serious note, is pre-partum depression a thing? (Update: apparently the correct term is antepartum, thank you dictionary.com) My emotions have been all over the place this past week. I’m weepy thinking of meeting our daughter, but I’m also weepy thinking about the life change that’s ahead of us. I get mad at Jacob for not washing the dishes (that I never asked him to wash) or feel overwhelmed thinking about not having control over my own life soon. I’m tired and frustrated that I can’t sleep well, so I’m emotional about that. I hate my swollen ankles, puffy face and huge belly and feel extremely unattractive and that’s having an embarrassingly profound impact on how I view myself these days. Then I worry Jacob and I aren’t on the same page emotionally about having a child and therefore create fake scenarios in my head that then make me cry. Again, WHAT IS HAPPENING. I feel so out of sorts with myself.
All that to say, the Last Month of Pregnancy is no joke. Believe what they say, my friends. Believe it.